“My goodness, what am I going to do? I’m going to have to get out of this hole or I’m going to find myself in a bit of a problem here.”

So, he ended up just kind of calling out for help, just a little bit, not too much because he wasn’t the kind of person that connects to or demonstrates or exposes weaknesses.

And he believed asking for help was an expression of personal weakness. He didn’t want to be seen as weak because he was quite a proud man. But by now, he was realizing that he couldn’t get out of this hole by himself.

So, he said, at first soft: “Help.” Then louder: “Help! I’ve fallen into a hole and I don’t know how to get out! Can anyone help me, please?”

It just so happens that a psychologist passes by. She walked up to the hole and said: “Oh my goodness, young man, you’ve fallen into a hole, and here is something I can help you with. Please text me back with your problem.”

And the man said: “Yes, thank you.”

So, down she throws a cell phone in this hole.

So, he texts her: “I don’t know how to get out. Can you help me get out, please?”

And the psychologist texts back: “Yes.”

She started the stopwatch, sat down, and said: “So tell me, young man, how does it feel being in the hole? And let’s talk about the relationship that you have with your parents, particularly your dad.”

The man’s attention, while still down the hole, went away from being down the hall now when he focused on the nature of the relationship that he had with his father and all the other destructive relationships in his life. Then he realized that his life just wasn’t where he wanted it to be and he ended up devastated after around about 45 minutes, looking at his past life and pretty much everything that was wrong with his life.

He was sitting there in tears, absolutely crushed.

Then the psychologist’s stopwatch started beeping and she said: “Oh, terribly sorry. That’s just done for this week. So, listen, and if you would like to have another conversation, how about I swing by this time next week and we can have another chat.”

And the man down the hole said: “Okay, yeah, thanks very much for your help.”

The psychologist walked off and the man left down the hole, was not any better off than he was when he first fell into it.

So, it took him around about 45 minutes just to dust himself off, and shake himself down. He stood back up and he started calling out for help. Now, he was getting a little bit desperate because he was stuck in this hole and it was about to get dark.

A local doctor, from a practice nearby, passes by and the man shouts up: “Hey you! Can you help me out?” The doctor heard the man down the hall calling for help. So, the doctor approached the hole and said: “Young man, young man, you’ve fallen down the hole. Is there anything that I can do to help?”

And the man said: “Yes, Doctor, I have fallen down this hole and I don’t know how to get out. Can you help me, please?”

And the doctor said: “Yes, I’ve got just a thing for you.”

The doctor pulled his notebook out of his suitcase. He wrote down a few bits and bobs and asked him a few questions.

“You know, have you injured yourself? Have you got any bruises? Is there any bruising, anything like that?”

The doctor ended up writing a prescription and dropped it into the hole and the young man caught it.

“So what? What am I supposed to do with this?”, the young man asked.

The doctor said: “Listen if symptoms persist if you’re still in your hole three weeks from now, just come back and see me again, or just call out or I’ll come back and see you.”

And then the doctor carried on with his day.

By now, the man down the hole is getting frustrated with his “What am I going to do?” -situation in the hole.

Then a local pastor comes along and the man shouts up: “Pastor, I’m down in this hole. Can you help me out?”

And the pastor looked over the hole and said: “Oh, young man, my brother, you’ve fallen down this

hole. Is there anything that I can do to help you?”

And the young man said: “Yes, yes, pastor, please help me get out of this hole. I’ve been down here all day and I don’t know how to get out.”

The young man was now getting pretty irate and quite desperate and the pastor said: “Right, let’s bow our heads” and pray, ‘Oh, Lord God, I just pray you’ll help my brother get out of the hole here and just take care of him, bless him in Jesus name.’

That was it.

And the man down the hole was looking up and he said: “Now what?”

But the pastor then went away and by now the young man was just about crushed with his, “What am I going to do?” –situation.

So, he’d done his best asking for help but he hadn’t received anything practical, no practical guidance at all on how to get out of the hole, and no one even threw him a set of step ladders and he was just about ready for giving up.

So, he was now in the hole pretty much whimpering “What am I going to do?“, when one of his friends who also left college was walking down the road, munching on some fish and chips. He looked down the hole and he saw his friend down there and he said: “Hey, man, how did you get down there? How long have you been down there?

The young man answered: “Well, I just left the college recently and I’ve fallen into this hole, and I don’t know how to get out and I’m stuck. Oh, I’m just ready to give up I’m feeling depressed, I’m feeling anxious, I’m feeling sad. I think I’m just going to give up on life.”

And then his friend jumped into the hole, right down.

The young man who was in the hole stood up and said: “What are you doing? Are you stupid? I’ve been down this hole all day and I don’t know how to get out. Now we’re both stuck down here.”

But his friend said: “No, listen, I’ve been down this hole before, and I know how to get out. Come, I’ll show you.”

This story of the man in the hole can be seen in a few different ways, which you might also have found entertaining.

But the story is also quite metaphoric, where it can be quite representative of the role that a coach (the friend in the story) can play in someone’s life.

So how do you respond to the story? Did you notice how the man’s beliefs played a role in his situation?

Could it be that you also may, right now, experience a season or a stage of your life that you struggled with; that you feel you are now just absolutely crushed within “What am I going to do“?

You may have been stressed to the max, may have been through a traumatic divorce or the death of a loved one, perhaps the death of a child. Perhaps you ended up completely financially broke, and destitute.

Perhaps you’re just miserable with a mediocre life?

Now that you have a better idea of where to go with your “What am I going to do?” -situation, would you like to work with me?

Your current situation doesn’t define your future. With Mindful Mindset Coaching, we’ll navigate any challenges and steer you toward the outcomes you truly desire. Let’s embark on this transformative journey together!